There are no boundaries in codependent relationships. As a child and a teenager, I was so attached to Mom that I literally did not see myself. I really felt invisible and Mom was my identity. My identity was also falsely based upon my outward appearance and my achievements in school. This produced a false sense of self-image (how I see myself) and self- esteem (how I feel about myself.)
Self esteem identifies how I feel about myself. Self -image identifies how I think about myself. Both are properly developed from within the soul, not through another person, through achievements, or through outward appearances. Feeling invisible, being enmeshed with Mom, being a high achiever, and focused on my physical appearance all confirmed the void within me that only Jesus could fill.
I may have felt good about my physical appearance and my achievements in the academics, and I may have felt secure in the mother/daughter codependence, but these were all false external securities. Without a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, I was empty on the inside. Without a sure confidence in Jesus Christ living and working on the inside of me, I had little or no self-image or self-esteem and, thus, thought and felt poorly about myself. A keen moment by moment discernment of the presence of the Lord with and in me changed me. My confidence was restored because I determined to receive His gift of righteousness (right standing with God) . (Romans 1:17)( Hebrews 11:1) In righteousness you will be established: Tyranny will be far from you; you will have nothing to do with fear. Terror will be far removed; it will not come near you. (Isaiah 54:14) Righteousness eradicates all self condemnation and/or false guilt.
Friend, a total reliance and trust upon the Lord does not make one invisible. With Jesus Christ taking residence within me, my identity is seen felt, and experienced through His presence within me, working in me and working through me.
“Father God, You fill me with joy in Your presence.” (Psalm 16:11)
All our defensive walls will eventually be brought down in this divine and intimate covenant relationship. We become transparent as the truth of His love, His presence, and His Word becomes alive on the inside of us. As He teaches us how to fully walk in love even for both ourselves and our enemies. We need this confidence that righteousness gives so that we can properly set our boundaries with others and rise up and defeat our enemies, pray for them and love them anyway, not taking the attacks personally. We may not always be led to become their best friend, but we love them deeply by our prayers. (Ephesians 6:12) We do not fight against flesh and blood but principalities, powers, and rulers in heavenly places. Hurting people will try to hurt other people. As we rise up to continue to walk in the love of God, our true identity in Christ becomes a reality. Only through Jesus Christ is our self image formed. (Don’t let the devil have your true identity in Christ. Continue to walk in love no matter what trials come to you. That is you greatest weapon. And speak His Word to combat the thoughts.
“Father God, I am content.”
From one man He made every nation of men that they should inhabit the whole earth: and He determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live. God did this so that men would seek Him and perhaps reach out for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us.’For in Him we live and move and have our being.’ (Acts 17: 26-28)
I had to remove everything in my life that was not pleasing to God, and continue to this day to take all trash out. Leaving no room for the enemy to deceive me or to harass me. Beginning with leaving all the ungodly soul ties and all connections to them, leaving lust and honoring God with my body, leaving all impure motives- (The earth belongs to the Lord), leaving all envy and comparisons of others and asking God to help me to learn to be content with just who He made me to be, leaving all worry and doubt, consecrating my eyes and ears to the Lord. And these continue to this day as I ask the Lord to help all my unbelief and to strengthen my faith, and I sometimes receive counsel in these areas when the battle is too strong against me. Standing in faith despite the trials and the lies. I believe with honesty with God about my weak areas, refusing to worry, and asking for His help, I will develop a thicker skin in this area.
“Father, with Your help, I can and I will overcome.”
Remember the enemy could not enter Jesus because there was no sin in Him. This is about a walk of purity to become more like Jesus day by day. We are never going to be perfect, but we are perfectly forgiven. For if there is sin your life, repent fist and ask God to help you to get rid of it, lest the devil outwit us. 1st John 1:9 For if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
“Thank You Father for You have given me life!”
Taken from online site FREE @ http://www.speakyourhealing101.com Speak Your Healing from the Homosexual Deception, by Bonnie M. Egglehand Published with westbowpress.com and amazon.com avail as eBook or online FREE