I am “One With Christ” This is My True Identity – For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11) I Have Been Made Brand New “in Christ”!

When I asked Jesus Christ into my heart in June of 1981, I actually felt His Presence enter me. Something new was about to happen to me. I could feel a new season coming. It was the mother of a paralyzed teen (Christian family) who led me into the sinner’s prayer. I was on a nursing assignment to help care for this young 23 year old girl. The family had an “expect a miracle” button on her pillow case. She had been a leader in her Church and when I read the Bible to her (one of my duties on the job) her face would light up like an angel. I’ll never forget her face. It was a Black American family. The Mother said, on first meeting me, “You are a nice girl, but there are a few keys you need to drop.”But so did God. I wanted to be a nurse more than anything else. And when I landed my first private duty job, I met Mrs. Platt and her daughter, whom I took care of in sunny California in June of 1981. (Roman 10:9,10) (John 3:3) (John 3:16) (Romans 10:13)

I believed in God throughout my childhood, I did talk to Him in prayers I said, but I did not have an actual walking, talking relationship with the living God with the knowledge of all the blessings He had given me…. Eternal life, divine provision, protection, healing, and well being and a sound mind. I was raised up in the Catholic Church with the nuns who were my teachers and I respected them to the utmost. My family and I went to Our Lady of All Souls and Holy Name Church through the years, in New Jersey. Leaving family for a job helping autistic children and people with drug addiction in California, I was highly influenced by the people I met. And went the wrong way for about 8 years, from l973 – l981. I got physically sick. My body freaked out because I knew I was in the wrong place and with all the wrong people. Spirit (the real you) Soul (mind, will, and emotions) and Body work together. All is well when they are in harmony. When soul and spirit agree, the body has to also come into truth.

God has good plans for us. He sees us going in the wrong direction and He has a way of leading us to all the right people. I met a young man on the streets of Santa Barbara, California. I saw light in his eyes. Frank Becchio. He was a Christian man and he encouraged me to stay close to the Lord. I started going to a Church called Calvary Chapel and it met in a YMCA. I decided to go all for God, as I remember working out on the bicycles there and praying for the friends I left to come to Jesus. I knew I was weak and could not help them until I was in a free place and a strong place in my faith in Jesus. I made all new friends in the Church and started helping in the children’s ministry. The Pastor counseled me and I trusted all the leaders. I made some good friends and shared at Salvation Army with them. It was a new season!.

Healing from sexual sin takes time. Because we need put our faith before our feelings. We need to get help breaking ungodly soul ties from pastoral care ministers who will pray with us to break the connections both in the physical and in the spiritual that we have made. It only takes a moment to ask God to forgive us but it may take years to actually walk free from guilt and shame. It could take a moment or years. It depends on the person. But according to God, the moment we repent of sin, we are forgiven and washed clean by the blood He already shed for us on Calvary.(1 John 1:9)

I had no real identity. I was a classic codependent. In codependence, you are looking to another person to make you happy and whole. And try all you can to help them be happy. This sounds great but without Jesus as Number One in our life, codependence does not work! Jesus in us must be the center of every relationship or there will be no boundaries, no wisdom to love and forgive, no morals to be guided by and no Holy Spirit to guide us in the way we should go.

Fear of death always puts something or someone ahead of God in our life. Faith is the answer and the antidote to fear. When I welcomed Jesus into my heart, I felt His loving Presence, His acceptance, and His Mercy/forgiveness.It took me years what it should only take weeks or months to recover from living a homosexual or bisexual lifestyle. Perfect love cast out all fear. (1 John 4:18)

The missing ingredient in our lives before we come to Jesus is His gift of righteousness. This means you are now “right with God” You are now connected to the “living God”. No matter what anyone else thinks, says, implies, or gestures. When He sees you, He sees another Son or Daughter of His like He sees His Son, Jesus. Always place Jesus between you and the other person you are talking to . When you know you are right with God, you get your CONFIDENCE back. And this is what we need to receive from God. I always felt clean after I said my confession to the priest in the Catholic Church. But the Bible says we can come boldly to the throne of God. God is everywhere and it just takes a heart of faith to bow to Him, confess our sins, talk to Him, and listen for His words to us…. any where, anytime. (Romans 1:17)

Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.(Psalm 100:4)

As I read and studied the Bible, learning what God was saying to me through His Word, my identity found in Him, my confidence found in Him and His divine and perfect love for me, my true purpose in life was found in sharing Him with others and I changed from the inside out. I no longer wanted to cling to people who did not live by faith and who were sinning against God. I had complassion for them, but I had to work on my boundaries also. I grew over the years. As I gave to others, God always prepared the next step for me to stay in His will. (Romans 1:16,17)

I encourage you to forgive those who have abused you because the enemy wants to keep you in bitterness to prevent you from walking completely in the love of God and to bring you discouragement and self pity. Snap out of it! Coming out of this lifestyle, many people will harrass and mock you with words, gestures, rejection and the like. But remember God chose you for the very reason you are being challenged. He knows you will cling tighter to Him through all trials, tribulations, and persecution and pressures of life. He knows you will take your authority against the enemy whenever he comes to harass you with negative thinking and the like. He will show up in many different ways to let you know His eyes and His hands are upon you to stay close to Him. His love and power within you is greater than the world’s pressures and harassments. (1 John 4:4) Greater is Jesus within me than he ( any person , place, or thing) in the world.

I just stayed teachable receiving from anointed pastors, teachers, Bible teachers, prayer warriors, worshippers,evangelists, counselors….. Because I highly respected them, I grew strong in my faith and self respect came in time as I cherished the love God was giving to me through these blessed men and women of God. God is very patient with all who look to Him.

I still have areas of my life that need to be completely surrendered to Him. But He is patient and He listens to those who reach out to Him for strength in our faith. He is the One I ultimately have learned to listen for although anointed people lead me to His guidance.

To forgive is divine. The Holy Spirit helps us. My need to please others has been replaced to the need to please God first and foremost. And from there, obedience to Him comes. And a clear conscience.

Praying for all who have ought against me. Learning not to judge others. God is the judge of all men and women. I keep my position in Christ by saying about the enemies, “Count it not against them.” God always protects me.

I am not perfect but I am perfectly forgiven! Always praise and thank Him for life, breath, complete supply, health, friends, and, above all, His sacrifice for us all so that we can bow and honor Him first!

Have you Ever Seen the Rain

I’m on a roll

Not a Kaiser roll or roller coaster, not even a tootsie roll at the skating rink

This roll is seen with thunder

Like a drum roll at an NBA game

As I stop to bow my head and honor my King

I am joined by my Father and I enter under

The umbrella of His divine wonder

I stand amazed with energy

I can almost see His face.

And Holy Spirit in me says, “You did your best in a very difficult situation. Move forward. Get back on the skate board of life!Your life is valuable. Make every day count while you have life. Just one smile will make someone elses day. I am with you and in you and I am watching over you. Share your light with others. No matter what your brain says, keep a song in your heart and keep moving forward. Make a brighter day! Keep giving.”

(John 14:17) (John 16:13) (John 14:16-18) (John 3:3) (John 3:16) (John 15:5) and (John 5:8)(2nd Chronicles16:9)

The Lord Showed Up When I Spoke

I was awakened out of a sound sleep, my body shaking, I didnt know the cause. Whatever the cause, I said, “Help me, Jesus.” – Aloud with my mouth. And, my friend, my whole body stopped shaking and the whole environment (the sounds of the crickets outside and the sounds of my heater) became silent for several minutes! It had to be the Lord! He showed up and rescued me. If you experience tenseness in your body, take a bath to calm your body down. Take some deep breaths. Move your body around and do some stretches. Call 911 or 988. Call a friend or family member.

So I encourage you, if you experience panic of any kind, speak in the very midst of it, and watch God show up. (Mark 11:23) Just saying the Name of “Jesus” quietly will change the atmosphere. Whatever mountain is in your way, speak to the mountain, and believe without doubt, and that mountain shall be removed for you.

Stay connected to your church, your support group, family, friends, or even one other person and the gates of hell shall not prevail against you. (Matthew 16:18)

Another alternative would be to begin to worship and praise the Lord in the midst of any darkness or fear you may be experiencing.. Turn on the lights. Open your Bible and read from it. The Psalms are very comforting. Speak the Word of God, ” The blood of Jesus covers me.” “I command every spirit that is not of God to leave me now in the Name of Jesus Christ.” “No weapon formed gainst me shall be able to prosper.” “Nothing in all of creation shall be able to separate me from the love of God.” Play worship songs. Call a friend. Singing will change the atmosphere. If you have neighbors, do this in a whisper out of respect to them, but still outloud. When you speak your whole being hears and fear leaves. The Lord, His angels, and the Presence of the Lord will bring you out of darkness and into His (Jesus) marvelous light! (Colossians 1:13)

CONTENTMENT

Making Jesus Lord is where our communication with God begins. Our inner life with Jesus brings us maturity, as we learn to hear from Him personally as He speaks to us through His Word, the Bible. The supernatural world of a believer communing with God is just as if not more real than the natural world of the five senses.

Being content is important in living out our God given purpose in life. Being able to be socially present with others with strong boundaries. As a teen and early twenty year old, I was highly sensitive to others, with extreme empathy for people. Without a knowledge of the Word of God or a walking/talking day to day communication with Jesus, I became codependent upon others, where I lost my true self in them, becoming enmeshed in them. Not until I found my true identity “in Christ” was I able to develop a sense of compassion without losing myself at the same time. With a sense of “Christ in me”, I developed a shield around me. You are my shield,my glory, and the lifter of myhead. (Psalm 3:3)

Also underdeveloped in decision making, I was easily swayed toward the peer pressure from the crowd. And their opinions and their thoughts identified my sense of acceptance or unacceptance. I had to develop my sense of autonomy and good decision making. I got around people of faith who had these strengths and I learned from them. It is so important who we choose to hang around with. I got around people who prayed together in prayer groups. I learned how real the supernatural is. Church attendance is food for the Christian believer. We need others stronger than ourselves to help us grow, especially in our youth.

What separates us to live a life of contentment is beginning to hear the voice of God. When this happens, it is like a new born taking his first breath of air. His voice is real. It is usually not audible, but sometimes audible. It is a still, small voice. Not our conscience. Conscience is what we feel when we do something right or wrong. No, His voice (Holy Spirit within you) mentors us and says, “I will help you with this challenge. You will have victory over this. You are stronger than you think. I’ll help you heal. I’ll help you accept this and go on. I’ll help you to laugh, love, and live again.” or “Don’t feel bad. It is not as bad as you think or … Go this way”…… It is a nudge in the right direction. You might be driving and hear a song and something reminds you that everything is going to be all right. He (the Holy Spirit within you) will say to you, “You are beautiful. I love you just the way you are.” You may wake up feeling bad, but as soon as you start your day and get outside, you feel better as you go about the day.

As He speaks these loving words to us, we come to love ourselves again. And we find the jewel of self contentment within our inner selves. (Not in the clothes, the friends, the physical appearance, the wardrobe, what the apartment looks like, the car, the money, the job, the position, the grades)

If I am truly content, I am not concerned about what other people think about me because I already know what God thinks. Contentment is a supernatural anchor. It is rooted in the fact that Jesus loves me just the way I am, strengths, weaknesses, and all. So in time, I learn to rely and trust on Him, believing that He will bring to me what I need at the right time, place, and person. A parent always wants to give their children the best. He is our Father!

And the added benefit to this jewel of contentment is self confidence. And so, I can just be me, and trust that my confidence which is rooted in a God who lives within me will protect me with His shield. I am developing a humility in me that allows me to be honest with people. Self confidence than solves the problem of codependence. Because I now stand strong in my own personality, which sets me apart from the other person. Enmeshment is impossible with a person who has self confidence. How did this come to pass? From inferiority to confidence….Because the personal barrier is lifted of any secrets I have because I have been honest with God about my weaknesses. Without condemning myself, without even solving all the issues of my weakness, God still loves me and He still brings me His rest. Perfection is reserved for heaven.It is a lie that we must be perfect before we can enter the rest of God. I found this out when God gave me so much to do that it was impossible to complete it all. I had to rest! God has a sense of humor sometimes, and He knows how to get our attention.

And so, with self confidence developed, I stand strong in who I am, not in what I can do to help someone else. Boundaries now naturally just fall into plac and codependence leaves the scene. And I can now even better help people in this place of self confidence, with Christ in me, my hope of glory. God speaks to my innermost being on who to talk to, what to say, who to lead to the Lord which is our ultimate purpose in life. There is no force or spirit pushing me to do good. It is all done in the grace and the rest of God. And if I cross back to the old way, my body tells me. Slow down. Be at peace. Take a little vacation!

Friends, seek contentment. Make Jesus your Lord. Begin to talk to Him and listen as you read and study His Word. Look within oneself and ask God to help you with the things that are hard for you. Do not be hard on yourself. Get around people of faith who live with strong boundaries and live with compassion for others. Everytime I obeyed the Lord and still today, He always rewards my obedience and lets me know how real He really is. Obedience is hard, but the rewards are great. Take your time.

#Contentment will keep you from the deceptions that many teenagers are facing today about changing their sex or having sexual relations with their own sex. Marriage is between a man and a woman. Many serve Jesus as single men and women. But two is always better than one. If God made you male, you are male. Female, you are female. Do not be deceived by feelings which stem from past traumas, molestations, abuse, loss, whatever….. Deal with those issues and these other lies and deceptive feelings about gender identity will leave you. It is a process. But with God all things are possible. Bottom line, the Holy Spirit will help you to forgive those who have brought you pain. The memories will be there but the pain attached to them will leave you. Even some of the memories leave you.Always look to Jesus on the cross when needing to forgive something that is very hard. His words to the Father, “Forgive them Father for they know not what they do.”

It is your inner being, your spirit, that communes with God, that finds contentment is just who He created you to be. If you are highly sensitive, so be it. This is a gift from God when used properly with Christ in you, with self confidence and strong boundaries, following the Holy Spirits lead. #This has nothing to do with the need for a sex change. You are beautiful just as He made you! The spirit of a man or a woman is the candle of the Lord. (Proverbs 20:27)

Remember, We are responsible for training ourselves in the Word of God and in this communication with Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. And offering up our senses, sight, sound, smell, touch, taste, to God, watching what we engage in to purify our souls. When soul and spirit agree, the body has to bow to temptations. We belong to Jesus. Always giving thanks to God for what He has made us to be!

Surrendering to His authority in our lives brings us to contentment, and a security knowing we are totally in His hands. It is a little bit of heaven on earth when we know and experience Jesus Christ as our Lord living in our hearts, the Holy Spirit in us and hovering over us, and our Father God always watching over us.

Prayer of Self Acceptance

Prepare Your Heart of Faith – “Jesus, I believe that You died and resurrected for me. I surrender to You as my Lord and my authority. I am sorry for my sins against You and for the consequences of my disobedience. I turn from sin and surrender to You. I ask You to come into my heart and to be the Lord and Savior of my life. I forgive and release all judgment against myself and all who have sinned against me, in Jesus’ name.”

Enter into the Father’s Presence – “Father God, I come into Your presence with thanksgiving and praise in my heart with my petitions and in the name of Jesus Christ, my Lord and my Savior.” (John 16:23)(Psalm 100:4)

Take Jesus’ Authority over All Tragedy and Declare Your Heart Healed and Whole to be Used of God to Minister to Others in Jesus’ Name

Thank you, Lord Jesus, for forgiving me of my sins. (1st John 1:9) I ask You to forgive my ancestors their sins. I close every door for entrance of any generational curse or demon to attach or attack or affect me. (Exodus 20:5,6) By faith in Your finished work at the cross of Calvary, (Heb 11:1), I now receive complete forgiveness and I receive Your mercy and Your grace. (1st John 1:9) Thank You for freeing me from the curse. Thank You for loving me. (Isaiah 43:4) You are my strength and my song, Lord Jesus. I discern Your very presence in the very depths of my innermost being. (1st Cor. 11:23) I declare my body and my soul: my thoughts, my emotions, my will, and my spirit healed, in Your precious name, Lord Jesus. (Isaiah 53:3-5) (Phil. 2:9) Thank You, Lord Jesus, I know and believe that Your love covers me. ” (Jer. 29:11) (Isaiah 43: 3,4) (Joshua 1:5)

I thank You, Lord Jesus, for giving Your life to me on this earth. (Luke 23:53) (Rom. 8:34) Thank You for giving me an abundant life to live. (John 10:10) Through Your sacrifice on Calvary, You rescued me from the dominion of darkness and brought me into the Kingdom of Your dear Son, the Son Whom You love. (Col. 1:13) I declare in the name of Jesus Christ that I am in right relationship (righteous with You) because of my faith in Your shed blood on Calvary. (Romans 1:16,17) With sincere thanksgiving, I believe and receive Your total forgiveness and cleansing for my sins. (1st John 1:9) (Hebrews 10:19-22) I now close and lock the door on all perversion, codependence, fear, fear of man, all shame, all guilt, all self-doubt, all depression and rage, and inferiority in Jesus’ name. (Romans 8:1) (Romans 1:16,17)  I now commit through a decision of my faith and an act of my will, to leave all that is not of You; idols of greed, pride, sins of the flesh, all ungodly relationships and soul ties, co-dependencies, all New Age/occult involvement, and materials. (2nd Cor. 6:17)(Rev. 18:4) All pictures and gifts of past lovers and friends who were ungodly. You, Lord Jesus, despised these for me on the cross. (Exodus 20:3) (1st Thes. 5:22) (Rom. 1:16) (Heb. 12:2)  I commit to daily study of the Word of God and prayer with praise and worship to keep my vessel filled with the Holy Spirit.” (Luke 11:24-26) (Rom. 12:2) (Pro. 4:20) (James 5:16) (Psalms 33:1-3) (John 4:24)

“I am safe, under Your divine protection… I am covered by Your precious blood because I live in covenant relationship with You in the secret place of the Most High God. (Psalm 91:1) With the help of the Holy Spirit, I will overcome evil with good. (Rom. 12:21) I refuse to react to hate with hate, but I will ignore the devil’s lies and deceptions, and walk in love as the jewel You gave me. Your precious blood sets a standard against all enemies in my life. (Isaiah 59:19)(1st Peter 2:24) Thank You, Lord Jesus, for the provision of grace that Your sacrifice has made for me. (Ephesians 2:8,9) I will reach out to comfort others with the same comfort with which You have comforted me.” (2nd Cor. 1:4) (Isaiah 43:4) (Psalm 118:14) (1st Cor. 11:23-30) Thank You Jesus.

Full Circle

When we come full circle

We are at rest in His presence

No running necessary in this place

This is a place of victory

Because we accept the

Sovereignty of God in every matter of life.

That for whatever has happened

Or will happen in the future

God was and will continue to be in control

His loving hand of mercy, grace and lovingkindness, and His divine protection is upon us.

He is a good, good Father!

“Now we who have believed enter that rest. (Hebrews 4:3)

Finding contentment “I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all things through Christ Who gives me strength.” (Phil. 4: 12)

In the full circle place, we stand in faith, accepting our mistakes and still going forward, with Jesus Christ in us and for us in the face of every other circumstance of life.

FULL CIRCLE

Codependence

When my focus of attention is on helping (fixing) the other person, I can easily divert myself from the very things that I need to change in my life. The best way to give to another is when I have strong boundaries, when I am able to judge where I end and someone else begins. I am not you and you are not me. Therefore, because any change in behavior, it must come from within each individual person. I must look within myself to see where I am weak and where I am strong. Asking God to help me to change what needs to change.

When I come to the realization or revelation that I will never change another person, my self blaming mindset will be undone. And I let go and give the person to God. A false sense of responsibility feels responsible for the sufferings of others, especially those we love the most. However, when I come to the revelation that my only relief from suffering came from obeying what God told me to do, putting God first, and letting him develop within me a clear conscience before Him, that is when my fear of man and mans opinion began to decrease. And I began to fight for my own life. Because when we are in right standing with God, trust becomes our best friend. I never trusted people well, except those ministers of the Gospel.

Ok so not perfect. When I sin, I ask His forgiveness. And I must then receive His forgiveness. But with someone I am concerned about, what does the Holy Spirit say to me? “This is not your responsibility to change this person. It is only possible for someone to change and grow as the Holy Spirit convicts them. There decisions are there’s. So, therefore, my child, you cannot and must not blame yourself. Do what you can and pray that the eyes of their heart will be enlightened to know what they must do, give them pointers and share yourself and your own testimony with them. And Pray for them without a sense of responsibility but from the love you have for them.

A codependent person will always try to fix what is broken in the other person. Will always feel responsible for them in a way that actually keeps them from fixing what is broken within themselves. It is an avoidance and escape mechanism that the codependent personality takes on, thinking they are the “good person” for helping someone else. Yet they sit bleeding in their own false guilt and false blame. Holy Spirit saying, “It is not your fault.”

We are never responsible for the decisions of other people. When we step back from enabling them, this is where God steps into their life to help them to help themselves. I am not saying, do not love them. But keep your boundaries. (I speak to myself as well.) Some call it tough love. The best decisions I have made in life came when there was noone around but God! And, my friend, the Holy Spirit speaks.And Our Father God always will direct us as we read and live out the Word of God, the Bible.

I personally have been through some tough times as we all. But I do not have nightmares. I believe that contact with people of faith, learning to pray or talk to God, having what I call a gift of faith as I always know His Presence, much Christian counseling, and determining to walk in love, and learning how to love my enemies, (the greatest lesson of all), has brought me sweet full color dreams from God. Watch what you watch, listen to, focus on, who you hang with! It makes all the difference. If you choose not to make a lot of friends, ok, but be around people, like in libraries, restaurants, parks, churches, gyms, shopping, beauty parlors, and support groups. It makes a difference to be around people. It takes the edge off! One thank you a day to a cashier, can make a whole lot of difference in the entire day.

Sometimes God Will Give Us a Revelation about our Freedom He So Freely Gives to Us

God’s Love Cuts through the Heart of Shame – No more, Mr. Devil! I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus (Romans 1:17)

             Without knowing the supernatural touch of love that Jesus has for me, I was always searching for this fulfillment in people and in good works to please God. Once I began to experience and live out a real intimate relationship with Jesus Christ as the number one love of my life, He showed me His reality and began to come in and heal my wounds. We are only saved by the grace of God. Not by our good works. (Ephesians 2:8,9)

The pleasures of the flesh are temporary. But the love of God is eternal. Desperation for love drove me to experience what I could see, taste, feel, hear, and touch, and Satan knew my weaknesses. Sexual sin is sin against one’s own body, which belongs to God. The consequences of listening to Satan’s deceptions took years of precious time away from me because I lived in the shame and self condemnation even though I had repented. Shame kept me from fully receiving God’s complete forgiveness into my heart. I could not fully forgive myself. It was deep in my subconscious. Until some real kind and compassionate pastors showed me hospitality and favor in their churches. And there were many!

However, the journey took me to a sweeter place with Jesus, a place of faith and a walk filled with and led by the Holy Spirit. I welcomed Jesus into my heart in 6/ l981. Repented of all sin. In the company of the Platt family. Mrs. Platt led me in the prayer in sunny California. I remember one evening, years later, I was sitting home on my couch in Tulsa. I was born again but still hiding behind this hideous lie. Noone is worthy to receive the grace and forgiveness of God. It is His gift to us. Yet I could not forgive myself! My mother always told me, “You have to forgive yourself.”

To be severed and alienated within oneself also creates a sense of unreality. One may have an all pervasive sense of never quite belonging, of being on the outside looking in. The condition of inner alienation and isolation is also pervaded by a low grade chronic depression. This has to do with the sadness of losing one’s authentic self. Perhaps the deepest and most devastating aspect of neurotic shame is the rejection of the self by the self. [35] But, I determined to stay connected to the body of Christ and the Word of God to get free from this condition. I knew by faith that God would restore me to my true identity and I found it “in Christ “, Who I made my Lord in l981.

And, one day, while a Pastor/Dean was preaching, I received a revelation in my “heart” that I was completely free from shame, that I was clean before God and myself. I wept as he preached, but I was comfortable and trusted the preacher. I felt his anointing as he preached. And so, I was delivered from shame I had held unto for years! Praise the Lord! All things are possible! Now when people come and try to humiliate or shame me, I do not even go there because I am not there anymore to receive any rejection. No longer a vicim. I am a victor! My spirit is walking in my confidence in Christ, my heart feeling brand new, and my personality is full blown, just me, just like when I was a kid.Im a 75 year young kid!

Jesus comes to us and breaks through both the self-alienation and isolation.” “I am one with Christ Jesus living in me. No longer disjointed or disassociated. Accepted in the beloved, accepted by the Kingdom of God, accepted in the body of Christ, and finally accepting myself. Reality sets in as He loves us back to life and into our true identity. We become more conscious of His presence and His love, and the fear of man loses its power and control over us as we rest under the loving control of the Holy Spirit.

Recently connecting with some family members has also helped me to return to my true personality. Those family memories and early teen years are precious and bring us much joy, despite the hard times. The hard times unite us with each other also.

I received so much from the Lord in the very acts of worshiping and praising Him. “The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save.  He will delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” (Zephaniah 3:17)

*So friend, if you sin against the flesh, which we all do or have done, THE VERY MOMENT YOU REPENT and TURN from sin, YOU ARE CLEANSED FROM ALL UNRIGHTEOUSNESS (1JOHN 1:9) Celebrate the goodness and the love that God has for you. Find a strong Bible Believing Church – The Holy Spirit will guide you. And the body of Christ will welcome you in! This is your life!

Excerpt taken from Book, Speak Your Healing from the Homosexual Deception, Personal Testimony, Prayers of Faith, and Research – by Bonnie M. Egglehand (“M” for the Mighty Hand of God who rescued me out of the mud and My Dad always called me “Lonnie Egg”

But Moses sought the favor of the Lord his God. “Lord,” he said, “why should your anger burn against your people, whom you brought out of Egypt with great power and a mighty hand? (Exodus 32:11)

You can find the book at Westbow Press and Barnes and Noble in paper back and also eBook. (I was never homosexual. I was influenced by a group of lesbians because of my lack of self confidence and low self esteem. and I did not develop the milestone of automony until later in life, (ability to self govern and therefore make insightful decisions well to say “no” or “yes”.) But God turned my mistake around to help countless others struggling in this area.

 Directed at the devil. “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. (Genesis 50:20)